This principle is often where I find myself clashing with my brothers and sisters. Taken at face value, the sanctity of life seems like something all Christians should be completely on board with. As with many things, it is in degrees of application. As a bit of a disclaimer before I start, this is not in anyway meant to be a criticism of those who believe differently. I mean no ill will to anyone who approaches any of these First Principles in a different way, in fact perhaps I could stand to learn from them. This is, however, a place where I agree to disagree. As is often the case, there are those for whom this is a logical argument and those for whom it is an emotional argument. I tend towards the logical side.
What is life?
According to the Oxford English Dictionary (my favorite of all dictionaries) it is: "The condition or attribute of being alive; animate existence. Opposed to death or inanimate existence."
Given this definition the major requirement is to be animate. I would extend that to saying self animate. To me, the moment of conception qualifies. After that moment the cells begin to divide on their own. From that very moment that life, self animation, begins life is precious. To me, all human life is sacred. Where I differ with many is that life in the womb isn't the only human life that is sacred or needs to be protected. It is all life that is sacred. The reason we fixate on life in the womb is because that is the life that is under attack at the moment, and it is life that cannot defend itself in any way.
How far do we take the sanctity of life then?
Because of my belief in the sanctity of life I am against the death penalty and most, if not all, war.
The death penalty is a much easier thing for me to explain than war, however they both share the same basic principal in my head; the moment you kill a man you've eliminated God's ability to deal with that man.
When a crime is egregious enough in this country we apply the death penalty as a means of deterrence. It's a very Old Testament ideal. If you murder then we kill you to serve as an example to others and satisfy the desire for vengeance/justice in the hearts of those left behind. It is very integral to our system of justice. If you commit the crime you must pay, and generally if you take a life you pay with your life.
I've never been able to square this with anything I find in the teachings of the New Testament. We are called to be merciful, loving, forgiving, to cast all our cares and anxiety on the LORD and, above all, be concerned with eternal matters specifically bringing everyone to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ. So...at what point does capital punishment satisfy any of these things?
In my perception the only thing capital punishment does is satisfy the desires of our flesh. If someone, God forbid, was to murder one of my children or my spouse the emotions that would spring up within me would not be remotely holy. My response, my desires, would be of a purely animal nature. My desire would be to crush the life out of the perpetrator. Would those desires be wrong? If I believe that all human life is sacred, yes, it would be wrong. When Jesus calls us to forgive, or indeed when he calls us to anything higher in the scriptures, he is calling us to defy our animal and/or sin nature programming.
What Jesus calls us to is exactly what happened when a gunman shot up a school full of Amish children years ago. The Amish community took the time to make sure who was dead or alive, and then immediately went to the family of the gunman. They mourned together with that family, told them they forgave their son, insisted on taking care of them, and begged them not to move away because of that event. Had the gunman not taken his own life, with that heart on display, I'm not sure that the Amish community would have even pressed charges. They likely may have forgiven him and let the state do what it will and, again, taken care of the man's family. THAT preaches volumes to my heart on many levels.
This isn't as simple as those who hold up signs that say, "Why do we kill people in order to show people that killing people is wrong?". In the words of King's X, "I have trouble with the persons with the signs/ But sometimes I feel the need to make my own". If all human life is sacred then is a convict's life sacred? Or are we going to pick and choose whose lives are more or less sacred? A fellow Christian was discussing this issue with me and he remarked, "Yeah, Will, but how much do we spend each year to keep them alive? It's cheaper to give them a lethal injection than to give them Life without the possibility of parole." I was too stunned to even respond to that line of thinking. Once that heart stops beating we have removed any shot at someone influencing their life for Christ. There's no chance for God to work in them once we do that. To that I've heard responses such as, "Well, if God really wants to save them He'll get it done before the execution." How cheaply we regard life and capriciously we treat God's work.
If all human life is sacred then why do we support war?
This is where I'm the most shaky on this First Principle. By our mere existence we reap the benefits of those who have died in wars since the dawn of time. When I question how a Christian should feel about war the Revolutionary war gets thrown in my face about as much as the wars in the Old Testament. I wouldn't have the freedoms guaranteed (although lately I feel like I should put quotation marks around that word) in the Constitution and the Bill of Rights if we had not gone to war. Sadly, those arguments place the benefits we have as more important over what the words of Jesus actually are. How do we wage war when we are to love our enemies? Where do we find the justification to take another man's life when He specifically tells us not to stand in the way of a wicked man, but rather we are to turn the other cheek when beaten on one?
I do not look down on those who have served or think that military service is a sin or anything. I would never want a military person or someone in the police force to think for a second that I am not grateful for what they do. If the United States of America didn't get involved in World War II the slaughter would have continued. I am merely saying that if all human life is sacred then what do we do with that? I can't look at the scriptures and honestly say that it permits me to take a life...even in defense of my own person.
Now, in both of these concepts, capital punishment and war, I recognize their justifiable validity. The world would not work "properly" without them. The world outside the Church needs them. God calls His people to crazy things. As I've mentioned above he calls us to love our enemies. This isn't someone you have a disagreement with. He literally calls us to love those who despise us, ridicule us, and cause us physical harm (See St. Stephen and other disciples). He doesn't call us to be polite. He calls us to radical upside-down thinking on every level. Jesus in our lives calls us to defy every programming that the world has done to us.
My brethren have asked, "Well, what are you going to do if ISIS storms our shores threatens your country and family? Embrace them? Feed them? Forgive them when they take your daughter as spoils of war?" It's a hard question. One I can't actually answer as well as I'd like. I hope that I would find peace and a heart of forgiveness in the midst of persecution. There are Christians encountering just this in Iraq every day. There are more persecuted the world over. We have a comfy faith, comparatively. I don't know the answer to that question. Did Peter or Paul try to take out as many Romans as they could before they were taken to jail or killed? Did Peter try to get in one last punch before being hung upside down on a cross? What shows the work of the LORD in our lives better? Feeding our enemies or letting them starve?
It's a hard road to take seriously the inconvenient words of Christ when all of those around us would understand a moment of vengeance or justice, as the world would see it. I'm not sure the man that I would be in that moment, which is all the more frightening. Jesus...reduce me to love.
I'm reminded of the movie Kingdom of Heaven. As historically inaccurate as it may be, there was one moment that spoke to me. The King of Jerusalem tells Balian the following:
"A king may move a man, a father may claim a son, but that man can also move himself, and only then does that man truly begin his own game. Remember that howsoever you are played or by whom, your soul is in your keeping alone, even though those who presume to play you be kings or men of power. When you stand before God, you cannot say, "But I was told by others to do thus," or that virtue was not convenient at the time. This will not suffice. Remember that."
Sunday, May 24, 2015
Friday, May 22, 2015
First Principles: There is No Enemy
I've decided that among other things I should enumerate my core beliefs or "first principles" for anyone who cares to read this blog.
Now, I have to explain a few things first. These first principles are beyond the basic tenets of my faith. My first principles are not completely unchangeable. They are just very unlikely to be changed. My unchangeable principles cannot be violated.
Those Immutable Principles are the following: 1) There is a God. 2) He is the God of the Bible 3) the Bible is His holy and infallible word and 4) He sent his son Jesus who died as payment for the sins of those who believe, rose again and sits at the right hand of the Father 5) God is triune, three in one.
Now, beyond those things we can argue. Arguing first principles won't get you very far but it is a possibility...though extremely remote. These First Principles are not in any particular order of importance.
There is no enemy.
Notice that I do not use a capital "e" for enemy. Non-Christians will be confused as to why this might be important, whereas fellow Christians will mark it quickly. I'll get into that in a bit because I think the Enemy is not at as important as some do.
There is no enemy.
This First Principle came into my awareness through a Guy Ritchie movie called Revolver which I can't whole heartedly recommend to anyone. There's sex, violence, drug use, and the like that comes along with the gangster subject matter.
I did find it to be quite interesting on a spiritual and philosophical level. It comes from the period in Guy Ritchie's life where he had begun to be interested in Kabbalah, Jewish mysticism. The story follows a newly released gangster named Jake who wants revenge on the man who put him in jail for so many years. He falls into debt with an unconventional pair of loan sharks who seem less interested in getting Jake back on his feet and more interested in rehabilitating his very soul. They tell him that if he wants the money he has to preform some strange acts, each of which is designed to be a blow to his ego even going so far as to ask forgiveness from the man who put him in jail. The final scenes where Jake does this are amazing to watch as just the simple act of submission, asking forgiveness almost makes the mob boss go insane because the concept is so foreign.
Central to the movie is something the loan sharks tell Jake. "There is no enemy". They leave it at that and give Jake time to chew on it. More specifically, there is no enemy...outside of ourselves.
As we make our way through life we can't help but notice that there are people who like us and people who don't. There are people who work for or with us and we think there are those who are actively working against us. Somehow we find ourselves so arrogant as to believe this or that person is our nemesis, our roadblock to success or peace and self-harmony. The truth is, barring the occasional psychotic individual who would fixate like that, they aren't our enemy. Our own ego manifests and interprets what that person does as being adversarial. We have this innate desire to be the hero of our own story and every hero requires a villain. There is a voice in our head that is all to happy to provide one. An individual's ego is a potent force that warps the perception of the world. Once we see that the enemy we perceive is actually a mirror we hold up to ourselves, the world changes. That voice, that ego, is the greatest con artist in the world. It could lead a man to destroy everything that is good in his life. It spends so much of our lives, this other voice, trying to convince you that it IS you. But it's not.
As Jake says at his moment of realization:
"There is something about yourself that you don't know. Something that you will deny even exists until it's too late to do anything about it. It's the only reason you get up in the morning, the only reason you suffer the (crappy) boss, the blood, the sweat and the tears. This is because you want people to know how good, attractive, generous, funny, wild and clever you really are. "Fear or revere me, but please think I'm special." We share an addiction. We're approval junkies. We're all in it for the slap on the back and the gold watch. The "hip, hip, hoo-rah." Look at the clever boy with the badge, polishing his trophy. Shine on, you crazy diamond. Cos we're just monkeys wrapped in suits, begging for the approval of others"
Once we can let go of that addiction, that approval of others, then we can begin the hard work of figuring out our faith. Pride and ego are the twin forces that will kill you spiritually every time. And where do they live? Inside every one of us. I was asked a couple times by the pastor at my last church to give a sermon. The first time it was OK. Afterwards people shook my hand, slapped my back, and told me I did a good job. I was fairly uncomfortable but chalked it up to my typical low level social anxiety. It wasn't until my pastor critiqued it honestly and fairly that I started to feel better. The second time I think maybe two people told me I did a great job and I felt pride and ego ganging up on me in my head. You know what I did? Dishes. I found something dirty, inconvenient, and away from the praise of others...and I was better for it.
Now, back to the Enemy with a capital "e".
Do I believe in Satan/Lucifer and all his demons as literal beings with literal powers and sway on this planet? Yes. I absolutely do. Do I believe there's a demon in every corner or whispering in an alcoholic's ear? That part I'm not entirely sure on, and I lean more towards "no" the older I get. This may frustrate my hardcore Christian brothers and sisters, but I'll say this; Given the natural state of humanity since the fall, I'm not sure that they need to do much at all. Satan was right there in the Garden of Eden to push Eve and Adam to eat of the fruit, but he's nowhere to be seen, scripturally, when Cain kills Able. Yes, God warns Cain that "sin is crouching at you door" but not Lucifer. He says "you must master it". It's something within him that Cain can control. When Lucifer and/or his demons shows up I fully believe things would feel different. What's the first thing that angels say when they show up? "Don't be afraid". I can only assume that is because people have an innate fear of something larger than themselves. In my thinking the situation has to have a quantifiable difference beyond my everyday struggles.
The Hebrew word for Satan literally translates to "adversary". Pharaoh of was Moses' "satan". Goliath was David's "satan".
For me, I don't need a Satan outside of myself in order to get into a lot of trouble. The enemy, the ego, the adversary, the "satan" within is quite a handful on its own. I don't spend a lot of time worrying about Lucifer and his demon buddies because I figure God has that one to sort out. Besides, how effective would I be against the one without until I let Jesus deal thoroughly with the one within?
Pax,
W
Now, I have to explain a few things first. These first principles are beyond the basic tenets of my faith. My first principles are not completely unchangeable. They are just very unlikely to be changed. My unchangeable principles cannot be violated.
Those Immutable Principles are the following: 1) There is a God. 2) He is the God of the Bible 3) the Bible is His holy and infallible word and 4) He sent his son Jesus who died as payment for the sins of those who believe, rose again and sits at the right hand of the Father 5) God is triune, three in one.
Now, beyond those things we can argue. Arguing first principles won't get you very far but it is a possibility...though extremely remote. These First Principles are not in any particular order of importance.
There is no enemy.
Notice that I do not use a capital "e" for enemy. Non-Christians will be confused as to why this might be important, whereas fellow Christians will mark it quickly. I'll get into that in a bit because I think the Enemy is not at as important as some do.
There is no enemy.
This First Principle came into my awareness through a Guy Ritchie movie called Revolver which I can't whole heartedly recommend to anyone. There's sex, violence, drug use, and the like that comes along with the gangster subject matter.
I did find it to be quite interesting on a spiritual and philosophical level. It comes from the period in Guy Ritchie's life where he had begun to be interested in Kabbalah, Jewish mysticism. The story follows a newly released gangster named Jake who wants revenge on the man who put him in jail for so many years. He falls into debt with an unconventional pair of loan sharks who seem less interested in getting Jake back on his feet and more interested in rehabilitating his very soul. They tell him that if he wants the money he has to preform some strange acts, each of which is designed to be a blow to his ego even going so far as to ask forgiveness from the man who put him in jail. The final scenes where Jake does this are amazing to watch as just the simple act of submission, asking forgiveness almost makes the mob boss go insane because the concept is so foreign.
Central to the movie is something the loan sharks tell Jake. "There is no enemy". They leave it at that and give Jake time to chew on it. More specifically, there is no enemy...outside of ourselves.
As we make our way through life we can't help but notice that there are people who like us and people who don't. There are people who work for or with us and we think there are those who are actively working against us. Somehow we find ourselves so arrogant as to believe this or that person is our nemesis, our roadblock to success or peace and self-harmony. The truth is, barring the occasional psychotic individual who would fixate like that, they aren't our enemy. Our own ego manifests and interprets what that person does as being adversarial. We have this innate desire to be the hero of our own story and every hero requires a villain. There is a voice in our head that is all to happy to provide one. An individual's ego is a potent force that warps the perception of the world. Once we see that the enemy we perceive is actually a mirror we hold up to ourselves, the world changes. That voice, that ego, is the greatest con artist in the world. It could lead a man to destroy everything that is good in his life. It spends so much of our lives, this other voice, trying to convince you that it IS you. But it's not.
As Jake says at his moment of realization:
"There is something about yourself that you don't know. Something that you will deny even exists until it's too late to do anything about it. It's the only reason you get up in the morning, the only reason you suffer the (crappy) boss, the blood, the sweat and the tears. This is because you want people to know how good, attractive, generous, funny, wild and clever you really are. "Fear or revere me, but please think I'm special." We share an addiction. We're approval junkies. We're all in it for the slap on the back and the gold watch. The "hip, hip, hoo-rah." Look at the clever boy with the badge, polishing his trophy. Shine on, you crazy diamond. Cos we're just monkeys wrapped in suits, begging for the approval of others"
Once we can let go of that addiction, that approval of others, then we can begin the hard work of figuring out our faith. Pride and ego are the twin forces that will kill you spiritually every time. And where do they live? Inside every one of us. I was asked a couple times by the pastor at my last church to give a sermon. The first time it was OK. Afterwards people shook my hand, slapped my back, and told me I did a good job. I was fairly uncomfortable but chalked it up to my typical low level social anxiety. It wasn't until my pastor critiqued it honestly and fairly that I started to feel better. The second time I think maybe two people told me I did a great job and I felt pride and ego ganging up on me in my head. You know what I did? Dishes. I found something dirty, inconvenient, and away from the praise of others...and I was better for it.
Now, back to the Enemy with a capital "e".
Do I believe in Satan/Lucifer and all his demons as literal beings with literal powers and sway on this planet? Yes. I absolutely do. Do I believe there's a demon in every corner or whispering in an alcoholic's ear? That part I'm not entirely sure on, and I lean more towards "no" the older I get. This may frustrate my hardcore Christian brothers and sisters, but I'll say this; Given the natural state of humanity since the fall, I'm not sure that they need to do much at all. Satan was right there in the Garden of Eden to push Eve and Adam to eat of the fruit, but he's nowhere to be seen, scripturally, when Cain kills Able. Yes, God warns Cain that "sin is crouching at you door" but not Lucifer. He says "you must master it". It's something within him that Cain can control. When Lucifer and/or his demons shows up I fully believe things would feel different. What's the first thing that angels say when they show up? "Don't be afraid". I can only assume that is because people have an innate fear of something larger than themselves. In my thinking the situation has to have a quantifiable difference beyond my everyday struggles.
The Hebrew word for Satan literally translates to "adversary". Pharaoh of was Moses' "satan". Goliath was David's "satan".
For me, I don't need a Satan outside of myself in order to get into a lot of trouble. The enemy, the ego, the adversary, the "satan" within is quite a handful on its own. I don't spend a lot of time worrying about Lucifer and his demon buddies because I figure God has that one to sort out. Besides, how effective would I be against the one without until I let Jesus deal thoroughly with the one within?
Pax,
W
Tuesday, May 19, 2015
A Bit of a Tid (On a Jealous God)
"A Bit of a Tid" = Just a tidbit on a given topic that I don't have too much to say on...yet.
This past Sunday our worship leader took a bit of time to talk about, of all things, Oprah. I am not a huge fan of Oprah for many reasons, none of which I'll get into here. Our worship leader brought up her remembrance of an episode of the show where Oprah revealed the moment she stopped believing in the Judeo-Christian God. Apparently it happened when her pastor read the scripture to the congregation regarding God as a jealous God. Right then and there Oprah stopped believing. Why? Because jealousy is such a petty human emotion and any god worth their salt can't have a petty human emotion.
First of all, I'm always bothered by this sort of behavior. The Bible shows that God or his people don't meet the individuals expectations and they shut down...without ANY further inquiry. I've seen it at least a hundred times. "I like Jesus, but his fan club keep me away"...declares someone who self identifies as an atheist (In my personal dictionary Atheist is described as an agnostic with a grudge...but that's another topic for another day) or "Jesus didn't keep the sabbath so he can't be God let alone holy", or "How can a loving God allow..." These "road blocks" are fairly foreign to me. If something doesn't meet my expectations my first impulse is a minor "revulsion" followed by further inquiry to try and fully understand. So when something minor causes someone to immediately eject the idea...it significantly perplexes me.
Secondly, as our worship leader went on to say, the kind of jealousy the Bible refers to is NOT a petty human emotion. It's not the jealousy that I get when someone gets published before me, or when someone gets a PS4 that I've wanted forever. That kind of jealousy is not warranted and meets no criteria for truly logical behavior. I have no claim on that publishing agent. I have no claim on that PS4, etc. It is a purely emotional response. Let's say that my wife who swore before both God and Men to be mine, to cling only to me through sickness, health, for richer or poorer, suddenly cheated on me and decided to leave me for another man. Would anyone EVER say that my jealousy in that situation was petty or unwarranted? Would anyone ever fault me for burning with jealousy? No. Everyone would say that it was completely understandable and expected.
This jealousy is the closest definition we can come to for Divine Jealousy. If we have pledged our troth, our faith and loyalty, to Him then of course he would be jealous of that. The relationship he calls us into is even deeper than a mortal marriage which only lasts until one partner dies. If my wife flirts with another man I am within my right and compelled to jealousy. How much more when we flirt with other far lesser idols that are daily in our lives.
This dovetailed quite nicely with our pastor's sermon on the supremacy of Jesus that tends to be missing in our lives...which pummeled me into the ground and I'm much the better for it. That may be my next post soon.
Pax,
W
This past Sunday our worship leader took a bit of time to talk about, of all things, Oprah. I am not a huge fan of Oprah for many reasons, none of which I'll get into here. Our worship leader brought up her remembrance of an episode of the show where Oprah revealed the moment she stopped believing in the Judeo-Christian God. Apparently it happened when her pastor read the scripture to the congregation regarding God as a jealous God. Right then and there Oprah stopped believing. Why? Because jealousy is such a petty human emotion and any god worth their salt can't have a petty human emotion.
First of all, I'm always bothered by this sort of behavior. The Bible shows that God or his people don't meet the individuals expectations and they shut down...without ANY further inquiry. I've seen it at least a hundred times. "I like Jesus, but his fan club keep me away"...declares someone who self identifies as an atheist (In my personal dictionary Atheist is described as an agnostic with a grudge...but that's another topic for another day) or "Jesus didn't keep the sabbath so he can't be God let alone holy", or "How can a loving God allow..." These "road blocks" are fairly foreign to me. If something doesn't meet my expectations my first impulse is a minor "revulsion" followed by further inquiry to try and fully understand. So when something minor causes someone to immediately eject the idea...it significantly perplexes me.
Secondly, as our worship leader went on to say, the kind of jealousy the Bible refers to is NOT a petty human emotion. It's not the jealousy that I get when someone gets published before me, or when someone gets a PS4 that I've wanted forever. That kind of jealousy is not warranted and meets no criteria for truly logical behavior. I have no claim on that publishing agent. I have no claim on that PS4, etc. It is a purely emotional response. Let's say that my wife who swore before both God and Men to be mine, to cling only to me through sickness, health, for richer or poorer, suddenly cheated on me and decided to leave me for another man. Would anyone EVER say that my jealousy in that situation was petty or unwarranted? Would anyone ever fault me for burning with jealousy? No. Everyone would say that it was completely understandable and expected.
This jealousy is the closest definition we can come to for Divine Jealousy. If we have pledged our troth, our faith and loyalty, to Him then of course he would be jealous of that. The relationship he calls us into is even deeper than a mortal marriage which only lasts until one partner dies. If my wife flirts with another man I am within my right and compelled to jealousy. How much more when we flirt with other far lesser idols that are daily in our lives.
This dovetailed quite nicely with our pastor's sermon on the supremacy of Jesus that tends to be missing in our lives...which pummeled me into the ground and I'm much the better for it. That may be my next post soon.
Pax,
W
Sunday, May 17, 2015
On Children
I'm up late tonight. Normally I sleep well enough, but my wife offered to make chai and...well, if you've never had my wife's chai let's just say that you are missing out on one of the finer pleasures in life. I forgot, however, that since turning 37 last year my body is processing things like caffeine differently. Once upon a time I was capable of drinking a whole pot of coffee in one sitting and then stretch, yawn, and fall immediately to sleep. Nowadays even a cup of innocent seeming green tea will keep me wired.
I've been reflecting a lot lately on children. Specifically why God gives us children at all. I believe that God's purposes for things in our life are multifaceted and the trick is to catch the flash of divine light off each facet. As such, perpetuation of the species isn't the only reason we have children.
Most obviously, children round our sharp edges. Grandparents are clear evidence of this. Grandparents don't smile only because they get to give the kids back at the end of the visit. They've got the priorities straight. They know, through trial and error...but mostly error, what is and isn't important. Where in their youth they may have freaked out at a furniture scratch, or upholstery stain they realize none of this stuff stays around anyway. Face time, smiles, giggles, cookies, ice cream, loving, and being loved are the things that eternity is made of. When a grandparent raises their voice it's usually for a perfectly good reason. When they stand firm on something they know it's a hill worth fighting on. The younger the parent, generally, the more abundant the "fighting hills" there are.
When we parent we get a much clearer understanding of our own heavenly Father. I can't count the number of times I've said things to my kids and have practically felt the Father nudge me when it applies to my own relationship with him. "Listen, if you could only see what I see then you wouldn't worry about it." "I'm you're Papa. I only want the best for you, and that's why I insist you obey me on these things. I'm not trying to be mean. I'm actually trying to keep you from harm." "You're a part of me, child. How could you imagine that I don't love you?" "I delight in you even when you can't see me watching." "Nothing makes me happier than watching you be exactly who you are."
One of the surprising things has been in the area of relationships. The LORD is pretty sneaky with this one. When I married my wife it would have been very easy for the two of us to just become hermits. We got scolded for being too focused on each other at a few social gatherings. Now, when you marry your best friend and you married her for the right reasons I'm not sure what people expect. She's the most interesting person I know and I love her enough to pledge my life to her so...yeah...surprise! We used to leave Church as soon as the Pastor dismissed. We were quite content with our little "Nation of Two". Kids don't let you do that. Children force you into social situations, force you to stay in them longer, force you to at least try to engage in social interaction and forge relationships. When the Kingdom is made of the very stuff of relationships it shouldn't be too surprising that the LORD finds ways to gradually, lovingly, force us into making them.
Finally, because I've finally burned off the energy from the chai, the perpetual "why?" of a child is more than just information gathering. I can't count the number of times my eldest has questioned me on things and it's made me analyze and then re-analyze just why I believe something. I'm a big proponent of self analysis and consider myself an avid questioner of my beliefs, but it would be a lot more lax of a personal philosophy if it wasn't for my children. The other day my daughter asked me why Christians were being killed over in the middle east. My daughter is so very precious to me beyond just the "cute sweetie" thing. My mother's own way of thinking was "If they're old enough to ask the question they're old enough for the answer" and I've followed that ever since. I explained that because they believe in Jesus and the Bible another group who believes something different thinks it's a crime worthy killing. My daughter's done AWANA and Sunday school, etc. By all accounts she's a "good Christian kid". In that moment, because of her questioning, I realized that maybe she doesn't understand the big "why". Why do we believe what we believe? I already know that my own whys are constantly evolving but her's have barely just begun. She's been given a constant barrage of stories and information, but she'd never actually sad down and read a book of the Bible chapter by chapter. Why do people die for our faith on a daily basis? Why not, as she asked a little later, just lie and say you don't believe and stay alive?
As a result we started in John and have been going through a bit at a time. This is where we get to the truly amazing part of raising children. More than anything we get to go over it all again ourselves. Kids keep us mentally young. They exhaust us mentally and physically, don't get me wrong. But when they see something for the first time we get the chance to fling back to when we were that age seeing it for the first time ourselves. We get the opportunity to remember and get in touch with our most pure self. For me at least the adult stuff, the psych damage from whatever toxic source I allowed unwittingly to damage me, starts to slough off and I remember who I really am at my core. I get to remember what it's like to trust completely and love fiercely, because in the end that's what the Father's called us to and it would be so easy to forget.
Pax,
W
I've been reflecting a lot lately on children. Specifically why God gives us children at all. I believe that God's purposes for things in our life are multifaceted and the trick is to catch the flash of divine light off each facet. As such, perpetuation of the species isn't the only reason we have children.
Most obviously, children round our sharp edges. Grandparents are clear evidence of this. Grandparents don't smile only because they get to give the kids back at the end of the visit. They've got the priorities straight. They know, through trial and error...but mostly error, what is and isn't important. Where in their youth they may have freaked out at a furniture scratch, or upholstery stain they realize none of this stuff stays around anyway. Face time, smiles, giggles, cookies, ice cream, loving, and being loved are the things that eternity is made of. When a grandparent raises their voice it's usually for a perfectly good reason. When they stand firm on something they know it's a hill worth fighting on. The younger the parent, generally, the more abundant the "fighting hills" there are.
When we parent we get a much clearer understanding of our own heavenly Father. I can't count the number of times I've said things to my kids and have practically felt the Father nudge me when it applies to my own relationship with him. "Listen, if you could only see what I see then you wouldn't worry about it." "I'm you're Papa. I only want the best for you, and that's why I insist you obey me on these things. I'm not trying to be mean. I'm actually trying to keep you from harm." "You're a part of me, child. How could you imagine that I don't love you?" "I delight in you even when you can't see me watching." "Nothing makes me happier than watching you be exactly who you are."
One of the surprising things has been in the area of relationships. The LORD is pretty sneaky with this one. When I married my wife it would have been very easy for the two of us to just become hermits. We got scolded for being too focused on each other at a few social gatherings. Now, when you marry your best friend and you married her for the right reasons I'm not sure what people expect. She's the most interesting person I know and I love her enough to pledge my life to her so...yeah...surprise! We used to leave Church as soon as the Pastor dismissed. We were quite content with our little "Nation of Two". Kids don't let you do that. Children force you into social situations, force you to stay in them longer, force you to at least try to engage in social interaction and forge relationships. When the Kingdom is made of the very stuff of relationships it shouldn't be too surprising that the LORD finds ways to gradually, lovingly, force us into making them.
Finally, because I've finally burned off the energy from the chai, the perpetual "why?" of a child is more than just information gathering. I can't count the number of times my eldest has questioned me on things and it's made me analyze and then re-analyze just why I believe something. I'm a big proponent of self analysis and consider myself an avid questioner of my beliefs, but it would be a lot more lax of a personal philosophy if it wasn't for my children. The other day my daughter asked me why Christians were being killed over in the middle east. My daughter is so very precious to me beyond just the "cute sweetie" thing. My mother's own way of thinking was "If they're old enough to ask the question they're old enough for the answer" and I've followed that ever since. I explained that because they believe in Jesus and the Bible another group who believes something different thinks it's a crime worthy killing. My daughter's done AWANA and Sunday school, etc. By all accounts she's a "good Christian kid". In that moment, because of her questioning, I realized that maybe she doesn't understand the big "why". Why do we believe what we believe? I already know that my own whys are constantly evolving but her's have barely just begun. She's been given a constant barrage of stories and information, but she'd never actually sad down and read a book of the Bible chapter by chapter. Why do people die for our faith on a daily basis? Why not, as she asked a little later, just lie and say you don't believe and stay alive?
As a result we started in John and have been going through a bit at a time. This is where we get to the truly amazing part of raising children. More than anything we get to go over it all again ourselves. Kids keep us mentally young. They exhaust us mentally and physically, don't get me wrong. But when they see something for the first time we get the chance to fling back to when we were that age seeing it for the first time ourselves. We get the opportunity to remember and get in touch with our most pure self. For me at least the adult stuff, the psych damage from whatever toxic source I allowed unwittingly to damage me, starts to slough off and I remember who I really am at my core. I get to remember what it's like to trust completely and love fiercely, because in the end that's what the Father's called us to and it would be so easy to forget.
Pax,
W
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