We Played...And You Did Not Dance

A few weeks ago I was challenged by someone.  I don't even remember the context although it was probably me hating on social media even though I'm clearly dependent on it.

They said "Man's purpose was never to be entertained, but to know and experience God." (From memory...I'm probably botching that)  It really hit me hard, so hard that it's pretty much ruined me.  I've spent more than a few nights looking at my Netflix queue, my PS4, even my board games and I keep wondering "What the hell I am doing?"  That one comment has been like a virus, infecting my night time thoughts, especially those right before bed.  It's so basic, so foundational in fact that it shook the house of my faith.

A few days later a quote from Lewis' "Screwtape Letters" popped up on my Facebook feed talking about how one of the greatest things that demons is the human desire for something novel, new, and exciting.  

Both of those incidences manage to get me all ajumble inside.  None of it sat well with me and I'm glad that it didn't.

Honestly, I've spent a lot of my life not knowing who I am.  I've been in love with Jesus.  That's the best way that I can put it.  There are a lot of people who like Jesus or are just in love with Jesus.  He sounds great, he did a lot for us, we like the warm fuzzies...but how many of us enter into a committed relationship with him?  Like marriage level?  I'm not sure that I have before.  I certainly met Jesus, liked Jesus, and loved Jesus, but I think we are called to more than than just "dating Jesus".  Dating Jesus, to me, means that I spend some happy times with him and then go about my life when it's not Sunday or other times that I'm "available" to Him by choice.  Sure, I'm not seeing Buddha, Krishna, or Mohammed at the same time but dating isn't really a commitment.  I've said "I'm a Christian" and now I am beginning to understand that what I've been saying by that is, "Yeah, Jesus and I hang out.  We hold hands.  We talk about life.  You know.  He blesses me from time to time and I praise him."

A far different thing is what I think we are called to: "Marriage".  Literally taking his name.  I'm not talking about a cross around my neck or calling myself a "Christian", but to actually make him the fundamental figure and substance of my identity.  That's different than being in orbit around Jesus.  It's landing on the planet, sabotaging your own engines so you can never leave, setting up a shelter, and committing yourself to living in Him, breathing him in, and seeing everything from that perspective.

I'll admit I've been scared of doing that.  There is a certain anxiety in giving it all up like we've been called to, and there is no doubt that we have been called to die to self, to leave our old lives behind.

Today I was walking through a store that caters to all fandoms.  The complete spectrum from Star Wars, Supernatural, Attack on Titan, and everything in between was represented. It was quite mind boggling.  There was the core media products and then aisle after aisle of plushes, 1/8 models, key chains and memorabilia.  And I realized something very uncomfortable.  It's just for myself and my own wonderings.  I don't want to be confused as judging others at this point.  But suddenly I wondered...these are our legends and each legend almost has its own religion of sorts.

Have I crossed over into worship of Doctor Who when I spend more time watching the show, reading the novels, collecting the comics, admiring the memorabilia, and giving it my focused attention than I do the Lord Jesus and the Bible let alone talking about Him and spending time in his presence through prayer or any of the surrounding activities?  Can it be said that I am a disciple of the risen Lord Jesus when he is not my chief preoccupation?

If nothing else it exposes a significant deficiency in my heart, mind, and soul.

We don't have to go far in the relationship metaphor to find that this will cause issues.  If a husband makes his wife a "Football Widow" there is some neglect and friction that will have an impact.  If a spouse spends more time talking to and about a different member of the opposite sex than their own spouse what is going to happen?  Even if the neglected spouse isn't jealous will that relationship suffer?  I think we would all say that, quite naturally, it would.  As a Christian I'm called to love the "Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind, and strength and...I can honestly say I don't make the cut there.

I watch my kids and they are constantly begging to be entertained, as if that's the aim of life.  And apparently I've taught them that it is.  I feel the spirit's prompting, however, in a different direction.

If man's chief purpose is not to be entertained what is it?

The chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy him forever....and I've barely been about the business of either.

Pax,

W